We can make our plans, but the LORD determines our steps. Proverbs 16:9
5 years ago we began a journey of adoption. We knew God was calling us to adopt a total of 2-3 children, but we decided it wise to start with just one, a baby girl from China. He led us to our Anna Faith, and what a wonderful blessing she has been to all of us! She couldn't have been a better match for our family with her personality, joy, and affection. We know God created her to be a Dixon.
Yet from the beginning, we knew there was at least one more daughter somewhere in the world who God was preparing for us. We didn't know who she was, but we have been praying for her for almost as long as we've been praying for Anna Faith.
We were so certain Anna Faith would have a sister that when we set up her room, we got two sets of bedding and a bunk bed. We even bought two of a couple special gifts so the sisters could match.
Yet two years ago, after her 5 rounds of surgery were completed and we felt we were ready to add a second daughter to our family, we had no idea where the second paper pregnancy would take us.
Most of you have been following our long, difficult road to adoption. We tried domestic infant adoption first. We printed off several profile books, met with a lawyer who promised us we would be matched in a matter of time, visited several crisis pregnancy centers, hospitals, and OBGYN offices, asking them to share with birth mothers that there was a loving family who was willing and able to take in the baby girl she couldn't raise herself. But month after month passed and no phone calls came.
We then saw the open door to host orphans from Eastern Europe. After our first hosting, we pursued adoption of L, a beautiful girl we fell in love with. Certainly she wanted a family of her own. But sadly, she didn't. She rejected us due to reasons we'll never completely understand and our hearts were crushed.
So after experiencing that loss we decided to foster. Even if we couldn't adopt a foster child, we at least wanted to care for young girls in need of a family while we had room in our home for them, even if it be for short periods of time. After a seven month process of being put off repeatedly to be certified, we got our license. But once again, the phone calls never came. It wasn't until later that it was explained to us that because of living in such a rural county in KY, we likely wouldn't get calls except in the rare occasion of a more populated county's foster families having all their homes exhausted with other placements. So several months went by again with no children.
In the meantime we once again hosted, this time a sibling group that had no other hope of a family for the summer. We knew from the beginning (due to logistical and family reasons) we likely couldn't adopt them, but because we were their last chance of being picked (it was the last day of matching) we chose them. We fell in love with these two children, and as hard as it was, we chose not to pursue adoption. The Lord told us in a still, quiet voice "They aren't yours. They belong to someone else". We advocated, gave, and prayed every day, and at the very last moment of opportunity, the Lord led a family to host them for Christmas. Now they are in the process of being adopted by that very family.
Because of this long journey, God has done so much. Not only have our hearts changed as we've waited and prepared for our next daughter, but He has used us in several lives. We are so grateful for that opportunity!
Because of our move over the state line to Tennessee in January, we had to close our home as a foster home. To switch to a new state system would take several more months of trainings, visits, and money. We just weren't ready to go through it all again so soon.
So in January we had to make a decision: update our domestic home study in our new home in Tennessee or switch to international? Should we continue to wait for a newborn baby to be matched with us locally or pursue a little girl in a different country this time? We had reached a crossroads and weren't sure what to do.
A week after we moved into our new home, which is another incredible story in itself of God's provision and blessing, a Taiwanese family stayed with us for a week while they waited to return home to Taiwan after studying at the local university here. Things were chaotic. We were still unpacking, the kids were beginning back with homeschool in a new setting with different schedules and people around them, there were several rooms not ready to be used yet in the house, and we were at an all time high-stress mode. In the middle of that week Kris showed me an email he got regarding orphan hosting. We frequently get emails advocating for orphan hosting and adoption because of our interests. This email caught his eye because several Chinese orphans had been given full scholarships for hosting this spring. They could come to America for FREE, but just needed families to commit to them. This was a very unique opportunity that doesn't come around often at all! The only girl in the group was beautiful. We couldn't have a well thought out talk about it because of all the chaos, so sat on the idea a while. When we finally decided to pursue hosting this girl, several days had gone by. When I called the agency, they told me she had just been chosen by another family. My heart sank. But then she went on to tell me about several other younger girls she had files on who desperately needed forever families. They could not be hosted, but could be put on hold immediately for adoption. I wanted to say "Whoa, lady! I was just calling about a free hosting opportunity, not a commitment to adopt a little girl! We haven't even decided if we want to adopt internationally right now or not yet!" I let her talk though, and took notes. I assumed Kris was going to shoot down the idea of adoption immediately because we just hadn't talked much about it yet. But when I talked to him on the phone about the several little girls immediately available to commit to, he got excited! We requested to see their files and were at a loss. We were still in a high level of chaos in our home. We were working late into the night every night after he got home from work to get things done to parts of our house to make it livable. Yet we needed to make an immediate decision about adopting one of those sweet little faces from across the world?
I was drawn to a little 4 year old. Her smile stuck in my memory and wouldn't fade away. It was as if she was looking right at me from that photo.
We sat on it for a week. We prayed, I researched, and we waited. When there was a time of calm, we sat down and talked. That little 4 year old- she had been waiting for two years with a file ready. Yet no one had adopted her yet. Now that she's four her chances of being chosen are fading rapidly. Almost everyone wants a 1-2 year old. There are enough of them in the orphanages that the older ones get picked through and passed over because they usually have more significant delays the longer they live in their orphanage.
We looked at her photos again, and we decided. It is her. She is our daughter. We must fight for her and bring her home.
I sent the email, and the process began. We started collecting documents, printing off long applications and instructions, contacting our social worker, and the Letter of Intent was sent on to go to China. Then we waited.
A couple days went by and I contacted our agency director about the status of our request. She replied that it all was done correctly by us and arrived in China, but there was a problem they were trying to figure out. She said "Another agency may have your file and there may be another family trying to request the child you requested". We were in shock. After sorting through all the questions and confusion, we were told that our girl's file was accidentally handed over by the Chinese adoption officials to another agency. That agency had an interested family who was reviewing her file and hadn't committed to adopt her yet. China was going to give that family a full week to decide whether or not to request to adopt her before they would give us the opportunity, and only if that agency were to give us her file back. We were heartbroken and confused.
So we waited all week and only asked a select few people to pray that God would do His will. We had already chosen her name!
Two days before the week of waiting was up, while I was sitting at the computer, a fellow adoptive friend sent me a message. She is in the process of adopting a daughter from China as well through a different agency. There are dozens upon dozens of agencies that do Chinese adoptions, and we had no idea which agency had our girl's file in their possession. In her message she sent me a photo of our girl with information about her and how she needed a family. It came from her agency to all of their families! I couldn't believe my eyes. Her agency had the file! And since the family that was considering her just rejected her, the agency representative was trying to find another family for her! My friend gave me the number of her agency's director so I could speak with her personally. Long story short, if it weren't for my calling this director we likely would have never gotten the file back on our daughter in order to ask China for permission to adopt her. She heard my plea, called the people under her, and assured me she would resolve the issue.
I still can't wrap my mind around this. What are the chances that one of the couple of people who we had even shared our daughter's photo with could possibly be connected with one of the dozens of adoption agencies that could have had her file, and could have at the right moment opened the email that was just sent and immediately be able to contact me so I could contact their agency director personally and get things resolved? It is only God. Plain and simple. That is the only way this can be explained!
So very long story short, we were able to officially submit our request two days later, on February 20th. After a ten day wait to hear back from China, we received a letter granting us preliminary approval to adopt her, granted all our documents reach China by August of this year!
So with no further ado, we present to you our Lottie Hope:
She and Anna Faith are just 16 months apart, just like our first two boys. Anna Faith is thrilled to finally have a little sister! We are overjoyed that little Lottie will be so close in age to her that they can grow up together. Because of her reported personality of being gentle, quiet, and loving, we already are confident they will be inseparable!
We never began the road to our second adoption intending to go with a Chinese adoption again. But God knew. He had it planned from the beginning. So as Proverbs 16:9 says, we can make our plans, but the Lord will establish our steps. We know now that we weren't ready for Lottie two years ago. The Lord wanted to use us in other orphans' lives first. He wanted to give L. a family to love her and share the Gospel with her, even if it wasn't through adoption. He knew that E and E needed us first before they could find their forever family. Now they are on their way to being a part of a loving Christian home. He was preparing Lottie all this time and our hearts were being prepared for her.
We can't wait to wrap our arms around her as her Mama and Baba!
We chose Lottie for her first name because of an amazing missionary named Lottie Moon. This woman spent most of her life in China sharing the good news of Jesus Christ with the Chinese people. She died in China after literally giving her life so that others could live. We want Lottie growing up knowing she can live a life surrendered to Jesus just like this great woman of faith did. We chose the middle name Hope because hope has brought us to her. We have hoped and prayed for many years for her, and God has granted us our request. We also know that by adopting her, we will be able to introduce her to hope as well: hope of a future and hope in knowing Jesus as her personal Lord and Savior.
If you are wondering what we will call her, she will just go by Lottie!
Please be in prayer for us, that the Lord will provide everything we need for this adoption in a timely manner, that there will be no delays or issues internationally as we go through the process. We also pray that God will graciously allow her to be home by Christmas. While this is a possibility, there are many variables in our wait and we do not know within a 3-4 month window when we will be able to travel to China to get her. We will give regular updates as we complete the many steps along the way!
Thank you for joining this leg of our adoption journey with us. We are so excited that after waiting two years, we finally have a name and face for our daughter. We are already in love! She will be so worth it!